It seems there's always a debate on whether or not to involve children in weddings, and wedding etiquette can oftentimes be a bit murky on the subject. Some couples want to have the entire family involved, including ring bearers, flower girls, junior bridesmaids and ushers, while other couples prefer to keep their wedding an adults-only affair. Whichever path you and your partner choose, here are some useful points to keep in mind when trying to decide if you will be inviting children to your wedding:

Uncertainty is a Given

Because children are unpredictable and have a hard time sitting still for any length of time, you must be prepared for the unexpected when inviting children to your wedding. There's no way to control a crying baby during the exchanging of vows, and many children who attend the reception will be tuckered out long before the party ends. With that in mind, it's important to stay flexible and go with the flow at your children-friendly wedding.

Wedding guests will feel strongly one way or another about the inclusion of children at weddings, so whatever you choose, be prepared for some disgruntled and grumpy guests. The bottom line is, this is your wedding, not theirs, and they will just have to get over it.

The Cost of Children at Weddings

A wonderful alternative to those costly price-per-person meals is to offer a children's buffet table at your reception. Keep the table low to the ground for easy access by the children, and make sure it's stocked with great kid-friendly foods like hot dogs and mac and cheese.

Avoiding Uninvited Names on the RSVP Cards

Many brides complain at the number of RSVP cards they receive that have additional names, which were not included on the invitations, added to the cards. Most often, these names will be of children and/ or grandchildren. There are two graceful ways to navigate such a situation:

1. If you intend to have an adults-only wedding, use clear and concise wording on your invitations stating so. By simply adding "Adults only ceremony and reception" to your wedding invites, you will avoid those bloated RSVP cards from the get-go, and many guests will appreciate your candor.

2. If you choose to not use wording on your invitations that indicate an adults-only wedding, be prepared for those surprising RSVP cards and plan on making phone calls to your guests, informing them of the adults-only preference for your wedding.

Ceremony vs. Reception

One great compromise on the issue of children at weddings, is to keep the reception an adults-only event while allowing children at the wedding ceremony. This is particularly appropriate if you will be including children in your wedding party as junior bridesmaids and ushers or ring bearers and flower girls.

To avoid those crying babies and fidgety toddlers at your ceremony, you can also choose to keep the ceremony adults-only while allowing children at the reception later on. This is an ideal choice if you are having an early or late afternoon wedding with the reception immediately following the ceremony. There are some great ways to make sure children are entertained and enjoyable at wedding receptions. Read on...

Avoid the Boredoms

One hot trend with modern couples that wish to include children at their wedding, is to set aside a space at the reception for a "Kids' Party". This is usually a corner or room near the main reception hall that offers many different activities to alleviate kiddo boredom. DVD movies, building blocks, art activities or video games are all great options for the children's entertainment. Some couples will even rent a bounce tent for their reception - something that is usually enjoyed by the adults as much as by the children!

Consider Hiring or Assigning a Babysitter

Whether you choose to hire a professional nanny service for your wedding reception or opt to delegate entertainment responsibilities to the older teen and pre-teen children attending your wedding, it's a great idea to have someone overlooking the children and directing fun activities for them throughout the party. By offering both a fun space and appropriate supervision for the children attending your wedding, you will also earn huge brownie points with their parents, as it offers them a chance to relax and enjoy the party without constantly worrying about their children.